PROTOTYPE THEORIES. The Hang Up

I’m a gregarious person. Sensitive to the moods and energies of others, I don’t like to put myself into situations that could potentially result in conflict.

I recently ran into an old male friend of mine. Like most people do nowadays, we exchanged contact information via cell phone. This person, of whom I’ve always had a platonic relationship with, suddenly began sending me text messages of a very ambiguous nature. At first, I thought nothing of it, and replied with polite obligation, but as the texts became more frequent, their intonation became more disconcerting. Soon after, it was clear that his ulterior motive was sexually driven.

I found it infuriating to be parasitically disrespected by someone I trusted. As I stewed in my anger, I played out different sorts of confrontations in my head, when suddenly it dawned on me to let it go – to just let the negative energy pass, and to not be controlled by someone else’s hang up. I truly hope this individual gets the help he needs for his destructive sexual behavior, which had been a serious problem for him and his loved ones in the past.

Today’s numerous methods of communication have severely lessened people’s standards of accountability, making it easier for them to mask their inappropriate and offensive messages/materials/behavior with ambiguity and passive aggression.

Due to this particular experience, my awareness has been expanded on many levels.

I’m a bit smarter, definitely more careful, and have more compassion.

M.

PROTOTYPE THEORIES. Divinity Puff

His name is Donald. He’s a Brit. I knew him for approximately 1800 seconds, and he completely changed my life.

Last month I was in New York for Fashion Week and during my trip, I met up with my good friends Kira and Aaron at the 3LD Art Center for their Why Aren’t You Naked HD video exhibition. The place was filled with an array of artistic types sporting asymmetrical haircuts, creative dress, and introspective poses as they examined the art: multiple projection screens displaying high definition video installations.

I was talking to Aaron about the California job market when Donald chimed in, “My mum wouldn’t give me any spending mon-ay, so I went to make it myself. That’s what you need to do. You have a gift. You have presence, but you’ve forgotten who you are.”

He spoke about how many years ago, he became an Austrian antique dealer and how he felt we were similar in character and that was why he was so intent on relaying this information to me. He also advised me to “grow up and stop having people wipe my arse.”

Here was this complete stranger giving me a very serious and quite poignant life coaching in the middle of an art show: bizarre and incredibly random, yes; wonderfully and magically effectual – without a doubt.

We live in a society which sends the message that you can accomplish anything you want if you work hard and set your mind to it. Yet we are ruled by cultural mores and attitudes that silently build glass ceilings and rationalized excuses for inertia.

Had I not spoken to Donald that night, I might not have had the tenacity to make LITTLE MAGAZINE, so I’m eternally grateful to him for the most emphatic 30 minutes of my existence. After which, I promised myself to live by the following decree:

To not give up on your dreams and to realize every experience, every person you meet, every thought you entertain, any new thing you learn and teach, and every kind and terrible thing you do for love, is a marked contribution to our universe.

M.